Early Saturday

Dear God,
My father might say this is an ungodly hour and I should be in bed sleeping, which would be better for me and the universe, he would argue, than praying. I would be asleep if I could be. Two things keep waking me up: Ashley and immigration. God, are you as upset reading the N&O as I am? I'm having a hard time thinking of Sheriff Bissell of Johnston County as one of your children, yet I'm sure he can be a kind and caring man. To some people. But immigrants, he calls "trash." To a reporter. Knowing that his remarks are going to be published. Like all the elected politicians who knew racial hatred would get them elected 40 years ago...only now it's persecuting "aliens" that gets you votes. You have had a lot to say about how we treat the aliens, haven't you, God?

I missed Ashley so much yesterday. I sat in the meeting of the Governor's Advisory Council for Hispanic/Latino Affairs and heard the inspiring words of your prophet, Rev.Dr. Barber. I saw how many people were ready to lay their jobs on the line to speak up against this injustice when he finished speaking. Even individual members of the Council responded with passion to his call. And the council voted to do...almost nothing! They will send a letter to the Governor offering to convene a meeting in Johnston County. God, why am I not in this council? Why am I in some Nursing Scholars' Commission, where I do almost nothing myself, instead of speaking out on something I know about, or at least trying to... why did the Council let the nice Anglo bureaucrat talk them into "letting the commissioners have an opportunity to do the right thing..." How long should we wait?

It was deja vu, all over again, God. Remember when I sat, fuming and crying inside in the State Board of Education meetings? I would have to leave the Board room and call Ashley and tell her what was going on and strategize together. I would have resigned so many times if she had not given me her clear-headed advice.

So this prayer needs to wrap up, God, because it's getting complicated and I'll end up deleting it and Ashley's friends won't be able to read it and pray with me. I"m trying to get to the point, God: I need Ashley, and so does the work of justice. Your justice. I felt handicapped yesterday. If Ash had been at work, she might not have been able to help me anyway. Probably wouldn't have answered the phone. But she would have called back. But when I thought of calling her to strategise I thought of her tiredness, of her needing all her energy to run Sunny's birthday--by the way, THANK YOU, God, for Sunny and for her birthday and boundless energy---back to the point: Ashley needs to get better, stronger, healthy. I just want to remind you that she is a force of nature that You set out to do good. Restore her to health and fill her with righteous indignation and give her the energy to provide her thoughtful, calm and wise advice. I ask in the name of Jesus, who gave his life to liberate the oppressed and proclaim your justice. And in the name of all the "aliens"--your children--who are living in fear and need more advocates. Tu hija, maritere.